I yearn to hear the words that l know can hurt and heal me both ..
I yearn to hear the tenderness of its sound as it leaves the edge of your lips.
Its the comfort l seek to find most in the universe. That it be said with so much truth and reality in it.
Those words have broken my world before. I fear and honour it though cause for thousand times l have forgiven them.
Those words every time they are said l understand a puzzle of my life that had been anciently buried, yet again it is the exact words that reminds me of a cemetry am walking on.
Say them as much as l need to hear them but please mean them cause only then will they move my bones to life.
Blow in me a force of dreams,
Passion lived through pulses.
I remember how l have countless times felt this exact emotion , my heart fleeting away under my rib cage. He always the perfect image that turns everything colourful. To the look on his eyes to how he places his hands on the table. Everything he did made perfect sense, in a weird way l always felt we were in the same page but yet love was always made to make a woman blind cause as much as we were in the same page it was never the same side probably l was even far off to getting there and he was always a faceless man.
I am the one who always fall when people are walking straight head on. When they spin lies like their last breath, I push loyalty like if l didn't the sun won't rise. How l always get left behind in thinking all meant more than they did and how tears fail me and refuse to come out when l totally want to break apart in the presence of a moment that deserves an Oscar Award.
Its how l got to see that beauty can be a curse because for somewhat reason deep down l had wished you could see my soul before you see my curves, before you desire to touch my nipples you could ask me what l thought about the universe this day to how being in between my thighs, sweat exchanging could not be the one main objective on your list. I , wiling agree to me losing my mind in your objective but the motive were never the same cause mine left scars. Scars l will always see each time l pass through this passage. I don't blame any individual for taking the plunge afterall if the ocean is inviting why not.
Every time l had my hopes high to be confronted by the same hopes on the way down. To have to ask myself if l was dreaming, to staring at blank walls. I understand it too well how these words said can break a cup of tea even while muted. The words "l love you" are the greatest destroyers yet amazing constructors of all times. Next time you say them understand just the depth of how far into someone's life you are trading.
